The Kirk Theory

Although the Kirk Theory is named after no single golfer the theory was proposed by a renegade friend of mine. This rogue is a good golfer. He could be even better but in my entire life I have never seen any other golfer miss so many putts by such a small margin. I’ve tried to tally up misses according to side of the hole, time of the day and phases of the moon but no clear pattern has emerged. The flat stick of choice has a new grip, it is in good working order and balls are spherical in nature so a clear identification of the problem is not easy.

One theory put forward by the man himself is that in conjunction with being cursed, when each new hole is cut expanding earth rides the cup and as each player collects their ball, their feet press down near the cup therefore creating a mounding affect a phenomenon also known as Cardinelli Creep.

Over the course of a day this effect is amplified to the point where a mound is created. Although this mound is slight in nature it is substantial enough that for the cursed golfer it has the power to cause putts to drift past the hole.